Commercial levels for current pop/rock music is around -0.1dB peak, -10-12db RMS
The traditional process is to export your mix at between -3dB and -6dB peak (about -18dB RMS) and then Master it using compressors, EQ and limiters. At the same time you may need to downsample to 44,100Hz, dither and change the bit depth to 16bit.
Check out the Ozone mastering guide on the Izotope site. It's free and it gives you a starting point of reference.
Now using the new Slate Digital FG-X & liking it a lot....I also use HarBal pre compression & limiting to tame any frequencies that might cause problems & fill out any holes but that's just me....not everyone is a fan of it. Often if the HarBal frequency plot shows problems & I have time I'll fix them in the mix first. If it need too much change then it's obviously not right
I personally aim for around -10 but only on louder parts not an average of the whole song which will push your chorus way too loud
I find that doesn't sound too crushed but it's competitive enough that my band have stopped complaining things are quieter than commercial tracks.